Comments on Manners Mentor Blog : Simple. Savvy. Sincere.: Want to be Real and Polite? Here's How!

Hey, Maralee! Not a lot of time today, but just wa...

2009-09-21T08:18:46.346-04:00

Hey, Maralee! Not a lot of time today, but just wanted to chime in and let the out=of=touch publisher and the rest of the world know that YES, WE MOMS(WOMEN, CHRISTIANS)CARE ABOUT MANNERS! Manners are really an expression of Christian love and kindness, and our children need all the teaching we can give them about this very important part of life here on earth. Thanks for all your hard work in this area! Have a great day! MaryC

I cannot believe that those publishers believe Eti...

2009-07-27T15:36:44.539-04:00

I cannot believe that those publishers believe Etiquette is not what a parent wants!! I am a mother of 3 kids; a 13yr old, 6yr old and 4yr old. I would buy those books in a heart beat. Manners are so important and it starts from home. That kind of thinking is why society is losing manners. We need books like the ones you are writing. Please don't give up and let us know when they are published. I enjoy your blog very much. Thank you for your time and committment to writing all that you do!

Maralee, My Grandmother is 96 and still talks abou...

2009-07-21T19:20:10.542-04:00

Maralee,
My Grandmother is 96 and still talks about how important social graces and manners are to succeeding in our world and not just financial success but relational success. It is sad to think that there would be so many people in the world that would not think that manners don't matter. Maybe we can not all have every single manner for every situation perfected or tucked away to pull out at just the right moment, but we can certainly keep striving and learning to show our love and respect for others. Manners should express from our hearts the sentiments of thoughtfulness and consideration and not just be used to impress upon others what we believe to be right. Show them our love by our actions and let their hearts be turned to desire to learn and do the same. Your sweet, honest, practical and humble approach to manners will continue to turn hearts...and prayerfully those books will get published. :)

Oh Maralee! First of all it is so good to have you...

2009-07-19T17:35:26.681-04:00

Oh Maralee! First of all it is so good to have your blog posts back :) Great reminders of manners are needed when you are a busy mommy like me :) That being said, manners are very much a necessity! I am looking forward to your books for myself and for my darling daughter and son {and baby #3} :)

Everything works together for those who LOVE the Lord--we already know that much :)

Hello Karen! You were kind to e-mail! Thanks for ...

2009-07-19T16:44:35.084-04:00

Hello Karen!

You were kind to e-mail! Thanks for joining the conversation!

You're right, etiquette does prevent choas. It does it by keeping us all playing from the same playbook.

It's so encouraging to read that with your school library experience you would like to see Miss Eticat in every school, and read them, too! Thanks for the great compliment!

I was amazed to read that the publisher stated tha...

2009-07-19T12:22:25.252-04:00

I was amazed to read that the publisher stated that people don't care about manners and etiquette. Without manners and etiquette the world would be in chaos. I feel that people that have manners and etiquette are looked upon and treated more favorably than people who do not.
I volunteer at a local elementary school and feel that your Miss Eticat series should be in each elementary school's library. Heck, I would love to read the Miss Eticat books.

Dear Beth, How is one of the sweetest ladies I kn...

2009-07-18T07:47:59.774-04:00

Dear Beth,

How is one of the sweetest ladies I know? Hope that you, your husband and the three Goble girls are doing well!

As always, your words are so wise! Manners set the stage for building up and honoring one another.

They're cornerstones for living a life of graciousness, kindness and concern for others.

PS: I miss talking to you and seeing the girls! Just like my boys, I'm sure your girls are growing too big and too fast for. I wish I could turn the clock back about five years! (Well...some days I do!!)

Dear Tina! "Everything you do says something abou...

2009-07-18T07:36:49.443-04:00

Dear Tina!

"Everything you do says something about who you are!" Love, love that quote! Thank you for sharing it and also thnak you for saying you like that we included the adult pages at the end of each Miss Eticat story! It lets me know I'm on the right track.

Since the books wern't around when your children we're growing up, we'll have to get them out in time for any future grandbabies that might be comning your way!:)

Dear Ava, What a great service you did for your c...

2009-07-18T07:29:25.271-04:00

Dear Ava,

What a great service you did for your children instilling in them while they were young the understanding that no one reads their hearts or minds. Having good intentions is where all of us need to start, and too many of us stop! Only when we express our consideration for the other person in word and action do we bless them!

Your Miss Eticat books sound wonderful! I love tha...

2009-07-17T21:00:39.884-04:00

Your Miss Eticat books sound wonderful! I love that you have something at the end for us adults! I sure hope you find a publisher that will recognize the value in books that teach manners and etiquette. My boys are 26 and (almost) 29 and I would have loved to have books such as these as they were growing up. I have a quote on my refrigerator that says "Everything you do, says something about who you are"! I don't know who originally said it but it is one of my favorites!

Manners are desperately needed in our present cult...

2009-07-17T20:24:36.558-04:00

Manners are desperately needed in our present culture! Though manners may not be getting to the heart attitude, they definitely set the stage to "build each other up" and "honor all people" as the children of God are called to live out.

What an amazing thing for that woman to say! I am...

2009-07-17T16:47:58.827-04:00

What an amazing thing for that woman to say! I am a babyboomer and tried very hard to instill into my children all the manners that were taught to me by my mother, grandmothers and all other elder members of the family.
My kids are in thier 20's and send "Thank You" cards for gifts or services received by others, as do I.
How do people know how you feel if you don't send a note??
I believe you are correct, that woman didn't care about manners and was "shoving" her ideas onto the whole reading world...I hope you are able to find some other publisher that won't put his/her bias in your way.

Hi everyone, here's an insightful e-mail I just re...

2009-07-17T16:02:55.427-04:00

Hi everyone, here's an insightful e-mail I just received that I thought I'd cut and paste for you here.I love how the reader wrote about training the "attitide" of our little ones even before they're old enough to speak the words of graciousness! Great input!!

Dear Maralee,

I realize I don't know all the details concerning the publisher and your proposal, but I am very surprised that such a common necessity in child-training would be rejected as unwanted! In our preschool ministry, we focus on basic etiquette such as, "please" for sharing, "thank you" to recognize another's generosity and "no thank you" instead of pushing or yelling, in the earliest of years. In fact, we intentionally focus on these simple phrases before they can even speak their first words in an effort to train the attitude of those words! I hope this small example may be of some encouragement or incentive for different avenues to check other publishers...

The 2010 copy of Kaplan Early Learning Company's product catalog( www.2by2toys.com ), featuring P.K. Hallinan's "Let's..." Book Series. This Series includes titles such as: Let's Be Patient, Let's Be Kind, Let's Share and Let's Be Polite.

Thank you for all you do and please continue to encourage genuine grace in our society, families and children.

Hello Sandra, First off, welcome to the blog fami...

2009-07-17T15:08:38.874-04:00

Hello Sandra,

First off, welcome to the blog family! I'm glad you've joined and hope you'll love it here. If I do say so myself, we're a friendly bunch!

It's sad that as a teacher the only etiquette book you had to share with your class was one from 1955, and even then you had to dig it out of the trash. (That was very kind of you!) You really cared about your students!

Thank you for the suggestion of Scholastic Books. You're right, they would be a perfect match. I know teachers would love sharing each of the stories, one a week during circle time!

We already have 31 Miss Eticat titles outlined so there will be a story to prepare children for just about any situation they're likely to encounter.

I have even more stories for her circling around in my head waiting for clearance from ground control to land!

There will be lots more Miss Eticat in the years ahead!

Thank you for your encouragment, and again welcome to the blog! I really appreciate you being here, and I look forward to getting to know you in the months ahead!

Blessings,
Maralee

Maralee, I'm new to your blog. Thank you Christy J...

2009-07-17T12:32:51.598-04:00

Maralee, I'm new to your blog. Thank you Christy J. for pointing us in the right direction. As a former teacher who tried to teach basic manners, I would have loved a book to share with my students. The only book in our library was a 1955 book that was taken out and I got it out of the garbage. We had to teach character education and this would be very good books to use during this time. Scholastic Book Clubs would be a good place for your books. I'm not sure what their plublication part is called. Check with Scholastic. I can't wait to see them in print. I have 3nieces and 1 nephew that I buy books for. Good Luck. Sandra C. in Moulton, AL (no google account)

Hi Someone's Mom! (Cute name!!) I can believe abo...

2009-07-17T11:19:03.039-04:00

Hi Someone's Mom! (Cute name!!)

I can believe about the graduation and funeral actions. I've been in similar situations and witnessed about the same thing. Including someone talking on their cell phone during the viewing for a very dear friend of mine who had died.

Sadly, the general public (Not our blog family members!) too often adapt to the social norms of the moment without questioning if it's the best for them. Or, maybe it all happens so slowly (decline in etiquette over the last 40 years) that they're not even really aware of it.

A very smart ethicist once said when that occurs it's "acquiescence, not agreement." I fear that's what has happened to us today.

He went on to say,"Conformity does not imply consent. It simply attests to the incluence of one's neighbors."

The best way to impact our current society is to begin with ourselves and then to determine to raise our childen to the best of our prayer-filled ability to live their lives by a higher calling! One of kindness towards others expressed through words, bold actions of love and concern, and small scarifices of momentary restraint in public (texting, cell phones, shouting, etc.) for the comfort of those around them!

Thank you again for writing!

Thank you Cindy! Your sweet encouragement fortifi...

2009-07-17T11:02:17.155-04:00

Thank you Cindy!

Your sweet encouragement fortifies Troy, our agent and myself to keep on the journey till we find a publishing home!

I'm happy that you're joining with us to let the world know that no one took a vote to do away with good manners!

You and I and all of us who care will keep being the standard bearers till everyone catches etiquette fever!

Thank you again Cindy!

Someone definitely needs to explain to people the ...

2009-07-17T10:48:27.194-04:00

Someone definitely needs to explain to people the right way to act in public. I went to a college graduation last year where the students were in line for the processional shouting at people in the audience, then talking on their cell phones and wearing their sunglasses thru-out the ceremony. Of course, it was obvious where the students learned it because the family and friends in the audience were standing on chairs waving across the room to other family and friends. What in the world!?? In another "what were they thinking", I was at the funeral of a dear friend where people came dressed in cocktail dresses, torn blue jeans, and even leggings and go-go boots.

Some people, reading this, might think what does that have to do with etiquette? But to me it is more example of how we have stopped caring - about being polite and respectful.

Hello Anonymous! So glad to hear you like the boo...

2009-07-17T10:21:03.159-04:00

Hello Anonymous!

So glad to hear you like the book idea and would buy them for your boys and pass them along to your friends!! Thank you so much!!

Not to worry about Miss Eticat being too girly! She's the wise mentor who gives both boys and girls wise mentoring. I have two sons, and my co-author Troy has 3 sons so we ahve lots of personal experience when it comes to manners and boys!

The children Miss Eticat mentors differ in each story. She arives at a destination to help a child just at the moment he or she nedds it the most!

Not to woryy, they're equal numbers of boys and girls in the series. We didn't want to play favorites! :)

Thank you again for your sweet comments! We'll definitley have her show up to help some twins or triplets in one or more of the stories, that would be extra fun! She's gong to be one busy kitty!

Say it's not so! I could not believe it and had t...

2009-07-17T10:18:44.599-04:00

Say it's not so! I could not believe it and had to go back and read your post again. What christian publisher in their right mind would not want this book. I agree with Christy and her cute soap box! Press on.

Dear Marte, You're handling the situation well! Y...

2009-07-17T09:57:30.835-04:00

Dear Marte,

You're handling the situation well! You're not allowing thier lack of graciousness to allow you to change your standards.

Plus, you're setting an excellent example. Now since these are children, (even if they were adults) you can share nicely the rules and standards in your own home.

When in Rome, while we want to be accomodating to others, they must be bending to "do as the Romans."

Boundaries are always polite, and prevent your graciousness from becoming a doormat they wipe their demands on.

Keep being the beacon of graciousnees in their lives! When they're grown and mature enough to appreiciate it's benefits they'll thank you for it. If not in word, than, hopefully in impersanation!!

PS: You're not the bellman at the Ritz. Don't feel you need to put a TV in their guest room. As long as you provide other activities, and opportunities for interaction and conversation with you and your husband, a TV isn't mandatory :) No one, not even a teenager, has ever passed away from lack of sitcoms and cartoons!

Imagine a world without manners? Chaos would reign...

2009-07-17T09:55:44.325-04:00

Imagine a world without manners? Chaos would reign, I'm sure. Someone will publish this, and I'll buy it and pass it along to all of my friends. No manners are not dead. Since I have only boys, I wonder if you could modify it -- say to the Eticat Twins? My guys would respond more quickly if at least one character was male. Maybe that's the next book? Good luck and welcome back.

Good Morning Hattie, What an honor that you would...

2009-07-17T09:15:17.710-04:00

Good Morning Hattie,

What an honor that you would want to read the books to your granchildren!

I hope you get the chance to introdice them to Miss Eticat and her magical warmth that shows children how to interact with ease, confidence and kindness in their encoutners.

Isn't it nice to learn these things as little ones, instead of being asked by a future boss to attend one of my executive coaching sessions.

Sad thing is, I teach jsut about the same skills. The only thing that changes is the tone of my voice and my vocabulary choices.

Bottom line, what's right at 7 years old is right at 47 years old and beyond!

Thea earlier we learn, the farther along we are in being at ease and proactive in our encouters.

Thank you again Hattie! I'll send you an autographed copy when they're published!

Good morning, I truly enjoyed your posting today r...

2009-07-17T09:10:22.234-04:00

Good morning, I truly enjoyed your posting today regarding whether manners are dead. As a child, my mother was very gracious and we grew up treating all our guests in a way that made them feel comfortable. My husband's daughters were brought up to speak their mind. I think that is very good in some circumstances, however, during the holidays when they visit, they tell me where they are going to sleep (I have already made a nice room for them, but they don't want to sleep there because there is no TV), drink too much and use foul language, I am horrified and saddened. I say very little or nothing because they are my invited guest, but I would never do the same. I just try to divert the conversations. I think that many younger people feel that profanity is funny and okay. I do wonder how we have changed...where are the manners? My daughter, like me, feels that others seem to take advantage of our hospitality to impose themselves. These are all well-educated people. Oh, by the way, I will move or buy a TV for the guest bedroom.

Brittiany, thank you for your sweet compliment. My...

2009-07-17T09:08:23.600-04:00

Brittiany, thank you for your sweet compliment. My cheecks are rosy right now and it isn't my blush! I haven't put my makeup on yet today. Your kind words have made me blush! Thank you again!!